This has been a really rough election season this year and for some couples, it has been especially tough on their marriage. Politics can be contentious under normal circumstances, but when it invades a marriage, it can feel particularly harmful. Even if you have similar political beliefs, there is enough fodder to create unlimited arguments right now. Given all of that, it is normal to wonder if your marriage will survive this election year and it may help to know that many couples are in your position right now.
Politics Affecting Marriage
The New York Times reports, “… while people aren’t citing political differences as the sole reason for divorce, the topic is certainly compounding matters”. It can seem overwhelming and insurmountable, but the truth is we all survived the election and so can your marriage.
Studies indicate that politics are a factor in divorces right now. What can help couples survive this field of landmines? We can’t escape the stresses of the pandemic, nor can we easily escape any of the stresses brought about by the many political fires currently raging, but we here at Affordable Divorce Mediation work with couples in all kinds of situations. That includes helping spouses who are trying to manage a difficult marriage that may or may not end in divorce, but one that certainly needs assistance managing the realities of married life and the issues of our time.
Handling Political Discussions Properly
According to experts, the act of attempting to convince someone of something that you think is right is the crux of the problem. Acceptance of differences and respect for the reasoning behind those differences means a more harmonious and healthy relationship. That can be a very challenging line to walk in these polarizing times.Calmly discussing and avoiding the urge to convince the other person can make all the difference between a discussion and a bitter argument.
Dr. Susan Heitler in Psychology Today, says it is “…better to simply share perspectives if you want to sustain a gratifying relationship” as opposed to attempting to convince your partner of your “rightness”. Of course, the reason things are so contentious in this season is because of the intense polarization of opinions around our leaders and the hot button social issues that are front and center.
What To Do If Your Marriage Is Feeling The Political Sting
So, how do you handle a relationship that feels so fraught? How do you manage the issues with covid19 and children and school and on and on and when politics are invading your marriage, causing strife in the place we most want to go to for nurturing and support?
We know what a challenge that can be. We have found that patience, trust, active listening, and compassionate understanding are the essential elements you need to cultivate when you are married to someone who has a very different political view from you. Even if you decide that a split is the best solution, you will still be able to maintain a more harmonious relationship if you can master those essential elements.
What are some of your choices?
- You may choose to take a break from discussing politics or allowing it into the home
- You may decide to seek counseling for how to discuss contentious topics respectfully
- You might want to decide if this is just politics or if it relates to your values and then uncover how that will affect your marriage going forward
- You could find a way to come to common agreement on the most important issues.
There are many more options available to you that you can brainstorm together or with help, asthere are ways to conquer challenges; even the biggest challenges like the current political climate.
If you are struggling with any issues that mediation can help with, then we are here and ready to help. Please reach out to us to schedule a free consultation. You can visit our site at https://affordablemediationaz.com/ or call us at 602.622.2008 right away.
Tags: Election 2020